Several years into our marriage, we still haven't been blessed with a child, and I've been trying to discuss fertility treatments with my husband. However, due to his work commitments, he keeps refusing, which has become a major source of distress for me. My desire to have a child is overwhelming, so I've decided to use a sperm donation site I heard about from a friend. Justifying it in my mind as building a "happy family future," I've chosen to entrust my body to a complete stranger. The sensation of being held by a man again after so long, and the relentless flood of semen, gradually erode my rationality, leaving me with a feeling that there's no turning back. It's that single, impulsive moment that drives me forward.