It all started when I found a girl sleeping in the park late at night. I happened to be walking by after a drinking session and noticed her. Even from a distance, it was obvious she was completely drunk. I bought her some water from a vending machine. She thanked me with a slurred "Ahhigatou gozaimafu..."—doing her best to be polite. Hearing that, I immediately thought, "This is my chance." Without raising suspicion, I pretended to be someone she knew and quickly took her back to my place. I was drunk myself, but in situations like this, I somehow sober up and stay surprisingly calm. As it gets warmer, more people might end up sleeping in parks like that—completely unaware of the danger. Whatever you do, don't try this at home.